Who Would Have Thought?

Folks, today is now officially the third last day of the year and in the American tradition, I am now beginning to examine myself and this past year and I am realizing all of the things that I would like to change about myself in the year to come. I am planning for 2008 to be a great year. I will be turning 21, starting my Senior Year of college at UCM, applying to and beginning my internship in Washington, D.C., taking the LSAT and applying to law school, and a host of other endeavors.

This is a tremendous milestone for me and I am very excited. The road to 2008 has been a very turbulent and rocky one and through the past three years a lot has changed in my life both for the good and the bad. I lost and regained relationships with my family and friends, I found the courage to accept a leadership position at school, ran for student body president, held a part-time job, and managed to balance 16+ credit hours of school each semester. I have learned valuable lessons about life with my getting my first apartment, paying bills, budgeting my money, traveling and meeting new people across the country, participating in a pre-law summer institute in Illinois, learning to share my space with roommates, and learning how to effectively work in a group. But throughout it all the qualities that I have developed have shaped the man that I am becoming and will be for the rest of my life.

Since Freshman year, I have been on a long journey of self discovery, searching for self confidence and acceptance in this crazy world as a black man in America. My college experience allowed for the natural leader within me to shine and although I was struggling with my own internal social, emotional, sexual, and mental insecurities, I was able to find inner peace to effectively execute the tasks that I felt were important. However, in the process I think that I neglected all of the inner issues in my life and tried to hide them and shut them away in a little box.

In the process, I masked them with self confidence, conviction, assurance, pride, and perhaps arrogance in my other abilities, my talents, my intellect, and natural gifts. My hope for 2008 is that I can find a healthy balance in my life in terms of my social, emotional, mental, and sexual well-being while not compromising my academic, professional, and career goals. As the ambitious person that I am, I have never been one to devote unnecessary time and energy to tasks or pastimes that I felt were unworthy. However, for the sake of my spiritual and physical growth in the new year I plan to do some serious self evaluation and prayer to ensure that I continue to evolve into a positive and peaceful individual that loves self, others, and God and offers something valuable to my family, community, and the world.